Saturday, November 17, 2007

Officially Sheedy

I'm happy to announce that I am officially a Sheedy now! You're probably thinking to yourself, didn't that happen a year ago, when she got married? It's true, Hunter and I celebrated our first anniversary a couple of weeks ago. So I've been living with a Sheedy, but technically I was still a Johnson. You see, I hadn't yet changed my name.

It's not that I hadn't tried. There is a social security office right down the street from where I work, so one day Hunter and I journeyed down there to take care of business. How long could it take, right? Ha! I sorely underestimated the power of the United States Government of America's uncanny ability to make a simple process into an unbearably inefficient waste of time. Little did I know, the social security office is even worse than the dmv. If you have the unfortunate occasion of going to the social security office, be sure to pack several meals, two or three large novels, and a gallon of hand sanitizer. Because you'll be trapped for days on end...and 99% of your cellmates have never heard of shampoo. It is seriously out of control, and I can't believe there is not a better way to do this. After waiting for an hour and a half, we were still at least an hour away from having our number called, so we bailed. Enough of this, we have to get back to work!

So. I did some research and found that you can make an appointment; I figured this would be the way to go. I looked up the number, called, and there was no answer. No message, nothing. So I tried several more times that day, and a few times later as well. Not a single response. How do you make an appointment with an agency that doesn't answer the phone? Freaky friday, this was proving to be quite a joke.

A few weeks later, Hunter and I were working in Murray and I decided to try the social security office there. Maybe the downtown office is just worse than others; after all, it's awfully close to Pioneer Park and all the homeless shelters/services in the area. So I thought I'd give Murray a shot...to no avail. Once again, I waited about an hour while an entire THREE PEOPLE were called up. There was no way on earth I could wait another 2-3 hours for my number to be called, so once again I threw in the towel. Who has time for this nonsense? Certainly nobody who has a regular job, who works typical business hours...the only time the social security office is even open!

I considered trying to complete the process by mail, but I had serious concerns. For one thing, we only have one copy of the marriage certificate and I would have to send it in with the other forms. Which meant that if I want another copy, I have to go to yet another government office and fill out other forms and la-la-la it would be a lot of work. Ugh. I would also have to mail in my original social security card. Now, I know the government is mailing my new card to me, and I have no choice but to trust that it will be delivered without any problems. But it makes me nervous to think my identity is floating around somewhere in the care of the United States Postal Service of America, just waiting to be delivered to the wrong person. I'm sorry to say, I just don't have a lot of confidence in the postal service. So, that being said, I'm not eager to mail my original social security card and increase the chances of my identity falling into the wrong hands. And to top it all off, the mail-in method isn't even guaranteed; there's still a chance that I would be required to go to the office and finalize everything. So, I'm back to square one.

Well I kept procrastinating the annoying ordeal, and it paid off. :) Our good friends the Hadleys got married several weeks ago, so Kasie and I decided to bite the bullet and go to the scary social security office together. We planned to do it on Friday, when work is a bit slower, and we figured we would be there for quite a while so we were mentally prepared. Friday came, and we nervously headed to the office of unbearable stench and much waiting. And we survived! It really diddn't take too long, either. I figured we'd be there around 2-3 hours, but it ended up being about 80 minutes, all told. Praises! We were soooo proud of ourselves! This is quite an accomplishment, if I do say so myself.

6 comments:

All About M.E.('s) said...

Congrats on your official Sheedydom. I agree that something needs to be done about government offices. They are a joke!!

The Carter Family: said...

Yeah, officially a Sheedy! Of course I'd rather be a Carter, but you make a good Sheedy! Hee!Hee! Now you can get teased about your name all the time!!!

THE BRADY BUNCH said...

I agree - instead of the good saying "I climbed Mount Everest" they should say "I survived the social security office!" And it's funny how NO ONE at the office is EVER in a hurry - they are the slowest people around - it must be a requirement!! (I hope no one reads this that works there! It might end up like your last blog and be detected!)

Nathan and Esther said...

You should have lived in Cedar. When I changed my name, I was in the Social Security office a total of like 30 minutes. It was great. However, I do feel your pain. I hate waiting at government facilities, and I agree with Sarah, I think it is a requirement to be slow. I am glad that you are now officially a sheedy! yayayyayayayayayay!!!

ang said...

:'(

kaparowitzzz said...

One time, I didn't go to the office and I didn't have to wait at all.